Fuck You Karcher - and other idiot designers of SHITTY vacuum cleaner wares.

This gets into the absolute DUMB FUCKNESS of DUMB FUCK designers...

Who really should know fucking better.....

They are the sorts of retards, who deserve to have their heads smashed into their fucking desks, just for being SO fucking stupid.

Seriously - You fucking RETARDS at Karcher - really? The vacuum cleaner AND industrial vacuum transport / waste disposal systems have been used for a couple of hundred years AND you fucking RETARDS are still doing STUPID shit like this?

OK the problem - everyone who uses vacuum cleaners and then has to deal with SOME (most) of the blockages that occur - it's basically because of BAD DESIGN.

The piping - from the entrance on the ground, to the trash catcher or dust bag, MUST be designed to be smooth-ish and "catch point" free.

I mean THIS fundamental principle - in all vacuum pulled, pressure driven, gas based conveying systems is ONE of the most fundamental of principles - BECAUSE:

a)  Sharp turns, projections, catching points like steps, constrictions, etc., not only waste mechanical energy, by creating turbulence etc..

b)  They can be - especially for mixed media conveying - like shit up a vacuum cleaner hose, the NUMBER one reason for REPEATEDLY creating BLOCKAGES.

c) And this is what the DUMB FUCKS at Karcher and many other vacuum cleaner designers do - fucking IDIOT designs - for a machine that is designed to transport mixed media (shit from around the house and workshop) from the floor to the waste container....

They DESIGN the hosing system with INBUILT catching points.

Now we are not talking about sucking up underwear, or a T shirt - we are talking about stuff that gets sucked up the pipe, but won't get THROUGH the pipe... because of the jamming points, INSIDE the pipe....

d) Let me see - bits of dry spagettie, straw, paper clips, tooth picks, tissues, bottle caps, wood chips, splinters, crayon bits, pieces of card and plastic bits, paper pieces, dried cat shit, nails, wood screws, wood shavings, wads of  paper from cleaning things, plastic wrapper, bits of bamboo skewer, bone, plastic bread bag ties, washers, etc., etc., etc., etc.....

e) They are JAMMING inside the tubing, because they have got obstructions to the flow, to jam on...


Because the fucking idiot designers, of vacuum cleaners, design vacuum cleaners with jamming points inside the piping.

 That is why the shit jams inside the pipes....


A REALLY good design always has joints and steps, where it goes from smaller to bigger, so there is no chance of things catching and jamming - like so.

OK - do you "get it"?

Well this is what fucking stupid cunts do - and this is what the STUPID CUNTS in Karcher have done.....


The Internal Diameter (ID) of the hose is about 37 - 38mm, the constriction inside the step, is about 22mm internal diameter - it's a SERIOUSLY BAD catch point.

This is THE hose from a Karcher vacuum cleaner.

Take note of the internal diameter of the BIG flexible hose - about 38mm ID, on the other side of the REALLY constricted step - about 22mm ID, in the hose connector. 

It's a MONSTEROUSLY BAD jamming point.

Now to really probe it's ring.....

 
 The SMALL milk container cap - which is about 25mm Outside Diameter, comes up the hose (big hole) and hits the step (small hole), and then it jams and blocks the hose.

This is the institutionalised stupidity of the people of Karcher - and indeed much of the vacuum cleaner industry.

This is what they say about themselves on Wikipedia:

Alfred Kärcher GmbH & Co. KG is a family-owned company that operates worldwide and is known for its high-pressure cleaners and window vacuum cleaners.^[1] Headquartered in Winnenden, Germany, it produces both cleaning equipment and full cleaning systems. The world market leader in cleaning technology, employs more than 10,000 people worldwide. In 2012 the company posted sales revenues of €1.92 billion and sold 10.83 million machines. Kärcher has 100 subsidiaries in 60 countries.


You mean they have 10,000 dumb cunts, who design, make, manufacture, distribute and sell, vacuum cleaners that have parts in them, that are designed to catch on the shit they suck up, and block the pipes?

And despite the testing and all that - millions of times a day, every fucking day, year in and year out, for millions of people - the hoses are blocking up, because of their shitty fucking designs?

And NOT one of them has "caught on" to what fucking idiot designs they have created, how often they block up and NONE of them have any kind of a fucking clue about designing vacuum based waste transport systems?

10,000 dumb cunts? And the bullshit just keeps on coming.

I mean it is a GOOD vacuum cleaner, from the point of GOOD suction, and being relatively quiet.

(Unlike some of the crap that Mistral imported at one time - which had a thin plastic wand that flexed like a drinking straw, and was only long enough for some one about 5' in height  and it was as loud as all fuck - because their importer / purchasing dept / guy was a fucking retard so they dumped them for cheap on the market via Kmart.)


Well Karcher fuckwits - THIS is really what I think of SOME of your fucking idiot designs.

A message and a link too:

http://www.karcher.com/

You have been told, now fucking FIX it.


PS. I can design joints - gas tight, catch free, and will never work loose....

But the battery hen retards never "get this" either. $10,000 to design us an aerospace grade connector for 50c each? Nooooooo because they like dumb fucks on the payroll... INSTEAD of people who do it right first time.

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And for the SAVVY consumer, who gets really pissed off at having to make MORE purchases for things like vacuum cleaner parts - like filters and bags

Well because I am a TIGHT ARSE - and I am up on the smarts about filter design, adding prefilters to your Karcher's shitty air filtering system is a GOOD and simple to implement idea.

Why is their air filtering system so SHITTY?

Well it's small - meaning it won't physically contain much dust and fluff and shit, so it blocks up really easilly - because it's so small.

AND the filters are a prick to clean - because you need compressed air to do it properly which happens just so fucking OFTEN - and if you don't have compressed air - your basically stuck with tapping them against something - which doesn't work particularly well - which overall means, your cleaning the filter fairly regularly as a matter of course, and if you don't have compressed air on hand, to blow them out properly, the Karcher vacuum cleaner filters then need frequent replacing.

And I am never in any kind of a mood to fuck around, just to get shit done... you know I am not EVER going to make a special trip to the shops / phone calls etc., just to get replacement dust filters....

This is the typical Karcher dust filter.....

OK - how have I improved upon this.

I add about 2 wraps of polar fleece (polyester) fabric around the filter - held in place with 2 elastic bands....

This is the type of material - from track pants, sweaters etc..

It acts as a final stage or ultra fine dust filter, and it pretty much traps all of the finest of the finest of dusts, on the outside of it....

I also use these kinds of shopping bags, as the primary or first stage air filter.

The fabric will filter out enormous amounts of crap, and it breaths really well, and it's cheap and easy to get and fit.....

It's a first stage sieve - so to speak, anything larger than a grain of sand, gets caught and anything finer, gets caught in the final stage filter.

Like so:

Draped in the drum, like a bin liner.

The shopping bags are also kind of self cleaning, as under vacuum they pull up, and gather all the crap, and when the vacuum is switched off, the bag drops and the sucked on crap drops to the bottom of the bin....

So multi stage air filtering has HUGE advantages over single element filters.



So now I have a pre filter, and a final stage super fine filter, that are cleanable, washable, last almost forever, are totally cheap to obtain and replace, and the folks in Karcher, can stick their barely reusable "keep buying more parts off us" air filters up their arses.

And it also demonstrates the advantages of using a TWO stage filtering system, over a single stage filtering system....

My air filter elements can be shaken out and or washed out hundreds of times - and their air filter, needs an air compressor to clean it out properly, or frequent REPURCHASES.

My cloth shopping bag and polar fleece fabric (strips of OLD sweater) - can survive what? 200 or 300 washes...  or more...

Well 200 or 300 Karcher filters - what does that come too?Well I do know now - they are about $25 each - not including the cost of the time and overheads to make a trip to the retailer.... So if I ran a timber processing factory and used it to suck up all the dust and crap from sanding the wood, I could easily block up one filter per day so after 200 days =  200 filters @ $25 each = $5000

The Karcher air filters are SMALL - they block up quickly especially with the fine dusts, AND really - all the shit from the floors and that - blowing that out of the filters with a compressed air hose? Creating clouds of dust everywhere? Oh fucking come on.

And you only do that in a stiff cross breeze.... with the wind blowing from your left or your right....

So I think the initial purchase price was $130?, and then buying 10 more filters a year x 5 years = 50 filters costing $25 each comes to about $1250....

My way - one old sweater from the recycling shop cut into strips, and 2 shopping bags, and a few decent elastic bands - for one set of filters in the wash and one set in the machine = $10 - and they will last the 5 years - easy.


Yeah so the clots at Karcher can stick their filters up their arses - well and truly.