Fuck McDonalds and McDonalds is Fucked...

Yesterday I had to travel quite a distance, on the devil worshipping, satanist, animal fucking, beast of a motorbike (quote retard from FOX news for that shit)..

And I arrived in Bum Fuck Nowhere......

Big Place, odd shopping hours... etc.

And I am fucked.

So I went to Maccas - the name that the shit heads running McDonalds, STOLE from the community that abbreviated the name, and used as an invention of their own creation....for DECADES...

(The scum)

I tried out the "app driven self service menu boards, touched incessantly by females of all ages with their fingers - used for compulsively masturbating with in the toilets - with the same fucking fingers..."

Uggghh GROSS.

Well the touch screen boards are just fucking MENTAL - trying to find the cones (little ice creams) - I mean ice cream / desserts /  fucking - 5 minutes of logical searching.... = get fucked.

So I bailed on that and went to the counter - and I talked to a human.

I picked up 2 of their cones...(little ice creams which are marginally acceptable on a boiling hot day when dehydrated) and I had seen some adds for their guacamole or salsa and cheese coated chips...

Well I after the spotty and confused BOY and I finally got it sorted out... he showed me an empty packet...

"Ohhhhhhhh THAT is a single serve....." - good thing I plan to lose 10Kg this week by the simple process of malnutrition - I will get the large ONE - with half of each topping on it.


OK - small portion, tasteless salsa, mostly liquefied at room temperature chemical cheese crap......

And the guacamole?

Each one of these boxes - artistically arranged, and packed, are about 10cm square..... and they don't hold a lot of chips, and there is probably ONE level table spoon of each "condiment" on them....

I mean these things are tiny. As in elegant English tea cup saucer sized packs...

Price $4.50 Single or $7.60 (?) for a Share Pack (about 1/2 as much again as a single serve)

I mean these things are TINY. 

Do you know what - I can go to my local fish and chip shop, and get a BIG bowl of chips - which is about EIGHT times as many fries as Mc Donalds puts in their shared serving sized portions, AND I can bring along a tub of guacamole (or avocado dip), or a jar of salsa - and I can have a reasonably filling - and nutritional feed, in a reasonably DECENT portion size - probably being about 12 - 16 times the mass, for the same price as Crap-Onalds....

So I did... supermarket and then the fish and chip shop.

OK the bowl is about 36 cm across the rim...

Bowl of chips, table service $4.

$2 for 200 grams of shredded tasty cheese, and

$2.50 for the 300 gram jar of salsa, and

$3 for the avocado (guacamole-ish) dip.

The chips, the cheese and the salsa - about $9 all up - and about 20 times as much in it, as Mc Donalds... You know I am a fucking hungry man.

The guacamole (avocado dip) and chips. About $7 all up and it's all rather filling and nutritional.

And let me be very clear here, a DECENT PORTION SIZE of good nutritional FOOD - IS a GOOD thing.....

And while chips don't exactly cut it in terms of nutrition they are a GOOD hard working energy type food... it's just that lots of people don't work that physically hard to need all that energy.... ALL the time.

So as an occasional feed - they are all right....

Mc Donalds is neither nutritional and it's portion sizes ARE bullshit....

In one trip to the fish and CHIP shop, I have gotten table service, a bowl of fresh hot potato chips (2 of) that have 10 x the amount of chips in them, and with my own BYO toppings, it's not a spoon of dead cats arsehole cheese, I have 200 grams of REALLY good grated cheese, and 300 grams of Sala.....

The score on their fries - Sorry I meant to not use more AMERICAN dialect to describe FOOD.

The score on their potato chips. Nutrition, value for money and fill you up-ness.

Mc Donalds - Tripple 0 and the local Fish and Chip Shop and Supermarket 10 x points.



And since I only eat at McDonalds - like once every 2 or 3 years...

And I thought after eating that scummy portion size of shit flavoured food....

Liquid at room temperature - chemical cheese on my fingers - anyone????

No it's NOT real cheese grated on the chips, it's anal pus from dead cats, that can be poured out of a bottle....


Yeah so I ate round one, it didn't touch the sides, and I was pretty pissed off that it's top dollar for fuck all, and so I went and bought a BIG MAC....

And something else....

The spotty fuck, well he tried to FOIST a McValue Meal with that, onto me...

"Nooooo I just want the hamburger" - and you and your annoying corporate arm twisting sale pitch - Grrrrrrrrr.......

Yes - they are STILL trying that crap on....

And it also turns out that McDonalds has a policy of ONLY giving out small cups of water - instead of ONE large one....

So I got THREE of them....

"Oh the company policy is....." and it's a been a LONG hot ride and I am covered in sweat......

Awesome.

McDonalds - tripple fucking ZERO - for their doling out water policies and antics and nit picking staff....

Supermarket and large bottle of water - or almost any other place - Jug of cool tap water with the meal... etc...

10 points for other places besides McDonalds for generally not being fucktards about it...


And the BIG Mac......

I pulled this fucker out of it's box and I thought "Is this piece of nutritional dog shit, HALF the size it used to be? Or have my hands suddenly doubled in size?


Here is a little exercise in AREA and VOLUME for you.

Or where nastiness and maths work in your favour.

Using my extra ordinarily clever value of 0.78 to find the surface are of a circle..

OK - from memory and the issue of just making the point - say an "Old School" Mc Crapburger is 12cm across.... an then they replace it with one 7cm across - or in diameter.

Well you might think "Oh that is almost down to half the size.."

Not so - with maths - it's almost 1/4 of the size.

12 x 12 cm (to get the square area the circle fills) x 0.78 to get the incredibly accurate circle area or the portion of the square area that the circle fills = 112cm square.

Then we go 7 x 7cm x 0.78 =  (wait for it) .... we get 38cm square of hamburger area.

If the diameter was a true 1/2 the size, it would be 1/4 the surface area....

So by shrinking the diameter size of the hamburger, we now have ONE THIRD the area of material in the NEW hamburger....

And given that the new sugar infested pieces of shit Big Macs are about 2/3rds the height of the old sugar infested pieces of shit, for a MORE expensive burger than ever, your getting about 1/4 of the "food" - per portion, for the same fucking price (or higher).

I mean you didn't get much for $5.60 (current price) for a big maggot,  in the first place - at the old size, but NOW your getting 1/4 of that recycled dog shit - for the same price.

Getting fucking RIPPED OFF badly?

It's amazing what you can do with a bit of maths.....



So a HUGE fuck you to McDonalds and the shit heads running this crapfest American SCAM of corporate SLEAZE - with it's SHITTY (TOXIC) rip off food.


Back to the occasional FEED at the fish and chip shop...

And Maccas' the NAME created by the people who (used too) dine there - are on the shit list of the worst food vendors in Australia, as shit nutrition and really BAD value for money.

If there is a just you or a few of you, go to a REAL fish and CHIP shop and bring a bag of condiments from the super market - to sprinkle over them while you eat them - real grated cheese, salsa, coleslaw, avocado stuff, sliced pickles, tinned and chopped tomatos - with freshly chopped cool to hot peppers, crushed garlic, stuff from the deli, dips etc., etc., etc.....

I am not sure of the prices everywhere, so I am making this up a little - say $10 or so's worth of chips, and say $10 worth of loads of really great condiments,  you could feed like 4 people really well on one night out......

And fuck McDonalds.....