Smart Chix and Dumb Chix....

One of my bestest girl friends ever - incredibly smart and much appreciated.

However, some women are suited to battery hen jobs, with their battery hen mentality.

Unfortunately this includes answering the phone, in corporate types of "offices" - which is bad, because many of them would be more suited to licking stamps in a back room some where, rather than trying to compete in an open market, against smart women and smart men....

2 classic conversations yesterday.....

Very, very, frustrating and quite a bit shouty.....

I am after a particular product, in a particular container size.

Maybe 1 in 200 business will carry and supply it.

Kind of like truck tyres - and the manufacturers and agents / retailers / distributors, in the supply chain.

OK, so the corporate (dick heads) supply  ONE  number to do all the inquiries and transactions through - and finding a regional supplier, with a local contact number, can be a real fucking pain in the arse - magnified greatly by having to deal with endless numbers of clueless "dumb fuck" women......

First one - with access to the branches and agents - on screen in front of her.

Me: "Hi do you have an agent in regional city A?"

Her: "I can give you the number for the office in regional city B."

Attempted to read it out at me, but I cut her short.....


Mmm K.

People tend to want to buy locally, hence the SPECIFIC location based question, citing Regional City A, and do they have an agent there.

And rather than saying "No we do not have an agent there", she tries to push me on to a supplier, in Regional City B, which is about 250Km further away....

That is a 500K round trip.. Mmmm K?

This is not suburb A or B with 20Km difference between them, this is regional city A or B, with 250Km between them.

Duh.

And what adds mental venom - is that there are about 10 other suppliers of said product, in regional city A, so why even bother doing a 500Km round trip, to get said product, from regional city B?

And this dense fuck doesn't get it?

But rather than say "NO" straight out, she tried to send me to their agent, who are a long way away, and;

IF I had of purchased from the agent in regional city B, the time and costs of transporting self / courier services, and product over that distance would have priced the $$$ product, to 6 x the going rate, for said product in the required container size / volume.

It would have immediately priced the cost of the product, so far out of the averaged going rate, no one in their right mind could have afforded it.

But rather than say fucking "NO" - the dumb fuck attempted to do something that was not only outright UN helpful, to have followed through on it, would have been not only have been unhelpful, it would have sent me fucking broke...



The second dumb fuck.

In trying to contact another agent, from another supply chain, well both their numbers were not answering - over a period of several hours.

So I rang the corporate head office, and said this to dumb fuck No. 2, "Hi I have been ringing agent XYZ over the last few hours on both of their land line numbers, and they are not answering. Can you supply me with a MOBILE PHONE NUMBER, that I could try them on?"

The answer, "I can give you their office number." (here let me try to read it out at you)
 
So I nailed her for her stupid shit on the spot.

She ought to have said, "No - no mobile number for them, you will just have to keep trying their land lines until they do answer."

This is based upon the premise that if you can't contact them on their numbers, then neither can we, so it's your problem, and your just going to have to stick it out, until they do answer.


But to go ahead, and to TRY AND resupply me with the land line numbers, which serves no useful purpose, AFTER I have already told her I already have the land line numbers, is just a really fucking stupid, thing to do.

It shows she is NOT listening.

It shows she has little to no ability to put 2 and 2 together.

It shows that she lacks the comprehension to deal with something that is self evident.

And in telling her, "I have been trying their land lines - and they are not answering", I have just told her that I already have their phone numbers, so why is she going to try and supply me with something that I already have?

Fuck.

It shows that she would rather do something that is entirely pointless and time wasting, and serves no useful purpose, rather than get to the fucking point.  

"Na no mobile - you'll just have to keep trying them until they do answer."

The issue is sorted out in less than 7 seconds.

It's a hall mark of stupid people, that they will say 10 stupid things, that takes 10 times as long to say, that generally lead to no productive outcome, and it serves only to waste everyone's time, rather than saying ONE decisive, "Yes or No" statement of fact, or assertion, that finalises or concludes or clarifies the issue on the spot.

I like to take pride in clear concise communication, that cuts out all the crap, and gives me the "Yes or No" answers, with the "How much per unit volume, variables, times, dates - blah, blah, blah, minus all the waffling on with bullshit and the elimination of the "self evident" as a carry on to the latter, from the former...

"How much is a box of XYZ"

"Do you have an account with us?"

"It should not make any difference if I do or do not. And if your pricing is so variable between account holders and non account holders, that you have to ask these questions, and you won't supply a fair market price to all customers, unless I do tell you if I have an account or not, while I won't fight to the death over 5c, I am not going to spend 10 minutes of my time, trying to get a price, when I can call other suppliers who can supply a price then and there minus the bullshit. So you can either tell me your asking price, or I can call the competition."

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I like smart people. I love them. And there are so many ways to grow, evolve, change and improve - and there are so many opportunities to improve.....

And then you get 10 dumb cunts in a row - they should be shouted at, they should be UN-niced, ruded, and have their retarded crap thrown back in their fucking faces....

"Hi I am calling to pay my bill."

Not - "What is your account number?"

But - "Do you have an account with us?"

Just endless amounts of stupid grating shit.

Because if you follow on the logical sequence of these mentally defective thought patterns, 

"Hi I am calling to pay my bill."
 "Do you have an account with us?"

"Yes I do."

"Can you tell me what it is?'

 "It's XYZ-12345."


Well that has taken 4 steps, and twice as long, to get to the answer, as doing it in 2 steps.

And it takes mental effort, thoughtful consideration and practice, to refine the art of communication, to a clear, concise and to the point, art form.


The other way, is to drag every thing out, to needlessly clarify the formerly stated and self evident, to drift all over the place, to include and focus upon things that serve no purpose, or lead to no greater understanding, that are beside the point - and to take huge amounts of time to essentially achieve fuck all.

The best ones go like this,

"Hi I want to pay my bill."

"What is your account number?"

"It's XYZ-12345."

"How much did you want to pay, and what is your card number?"

All done - transaction, initiated, processed and concluded in under 2 minutes.

When dealing with a dick head, they will however, tend to drag a simple transaction out for 10 - 15 minutes, and I don't have all day to spend on them and their shit.


It's like guys in machinery type places, tend to be very much to the point. (Yay - no feminists and their idiot bullshit)

Where as women, in their corporate battery hen enclaves, tend to be clueless speakers of shit who waffle on much, to no good effect.

So if I have to call say 10 places in a day, with most of the men, most of the calls will be 3 minutes or less, but most of the calls taken by women, will tend to take 15 minutes, of go around in circles, stupid shit.  

So I can deal with 10 guys, in 10 phone sales / inquiries, in 30 minutes, or one half, of one hour.

But the women, and their stupid clueless, fucking bullshit, will take 150 minutes, or two and one half, of one hours, of my time - to get the same shit done.

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The combination of the mentally lazy, the bad habits, the clueless questions and the complete lack of causality - the "In order to pay a bill, I would have to have an account, and to have consumed goods or services, which would have justified a need to create and have sent a request for payment for them, which, as I have stated, is the reason I am calling".

When confronted with that crap, on the basis that their parents were idiots, their education providers were idiots, their friends are idiots, and their employers are idiots, I give them a free lesson in clear thinking and communication, by putting the responsibility for their crap back on them, by asking, "Why do you ask such stupid fucking questions?"

And they might go, "Oh what do you mean?"

I will correct and admonish - and retrain them, in one fucking sentence, with, "Well I could not have a bill to pay, unless I had an account, so instead of asking "Do I have an account with you?", ask me - and everyone else from now on, "What is your account number?" OK - because it gets to the point from the very beginning."


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That statement, "Either shit or get off the pot." - has a great deal of inherent value.


"Get to the fucking point."


"Don't take 10 minutes to say something that can be said in 10 seconds."

Etc.....